Writing Sex Scenes…Blush, blush…

So I was going through the folder of work I keep for the writing group (New Eastbourne Writers) that I belong to and I am now, (Cough, Cough) secretary for…Things are going up in my world, at least I feel like I have something more to aim for and not just my writing which of course is my main love. Speaking of love, the piece of work I came across was from a small workshop type of occasion when a guest speaker (Beth Miller) came to show us how to write a sex scene. I thought the notes and ideas I wrote down might help any romance writers out there, I have to admit I am not a romance writer I love my horror, Sci-Fi and Adventure but that’s not to say one day I won’t try it.

My notes include some tips that the lovely Beth told us but some are just what I think to.

*A sex scene helps to show character.

*Can show a characters vulnerabilities, they are striped bare and naked.

*It can help to move characters relationships on and to essentially move the story along.

*You can use your own experiences in your work but if you want to you can juice it up a bit and add more to it including sensations, emotions, feelings, tastes, smells and what the other senses can tell you and your reader. e.g. the smell of the woman’s perfume on her skin. These all help to make it more realistic so the reader can connect with the characters.

*All genres have rules about sex scenes, like putting a lovey dovey rampant sex scene in a horror might not go down too well with the reader, a quick mention might be better and leave it at that but in Romance novels the reader expects lust, love and all the nitty gritty. You also need to take into consideration the level of explicitness and whether your target audience will appreciate it or not.

*It is human instinct.

*Don’t write a sex scene that makes you feel uncomfortable writing it, as it will show in your work and the reader will pick up on it.

*Don’t use medical terms, not all readers are rocket scientists and brain surgeons, normal language is best to connect with the reader. Try not to be too coy about it unless of course it is right for the character you are trying to portray.

*Most of all make it fresh, people have read millions of love scenes, they want something that will make them go…’Oooo’.

*Try to avoid metaphors.

*Real sex scenes between real ‘human’ people can be awkward, funny, embarrassing and also sexy, try to incorporate some of these. It’s not always like the fake fantastic love scenes you see in films or on the telly, real sex can be so much more fun when writing.

I think following these tips should help you on your path to writing one. Here is the one I tried to write, mines probably not so much sexy more embarrassing and funny, I hope lol. Once you’ve read mine I would love to hear from you with yours 😉

‘Slamming the door shut they tried to make it to the bedroom through the lounge whilst still kissing, their lips locked together as they moved, their tongues still embraced from the first kiss that happened so suddenly outside.

Coffee, he had said coffee but then in dating terms didn’t coffee mean a different kind of drink? A certain love lust to get drunk on?

As she thought it the lust for him flared inside of her, kissing him hard she practically tried to drink him down as the alcohol still pursued to fuel their desire for one another. His right hand reached the door knob to the bedroom whilst his left hand fondled with her bra, he couldn’t quite get to grips with doing two things at once and accidently pinged her bra just as the door swung open making them both collapse to the floor.

She let out a moan of discomfort into his mouth that he read as a moan for more, he went to lift her up his mouth still on hers but she took control as she rolled him onto his back straddling on top of him with both their trousers still on. As she danced on top of him she lifted her top over her shoulders and threw it to the floor, his face lit up with amusement, looking down she blushed with embarrassment as the only bra she had been left with this morning as she hadn’t done the washing yet was her cute, cuddly penguin one.

Taking it off in haste she tried to get back to being sophisticated and in control, leaning over she kissed him harder, gyrating her hips on his totally awake manhood, making him moan into her mouth. Then it happened but not how she expected. The alcohol she had consumed all night decided to resurface, she just had enough time to shove his head to one side before ejaculating vomit all over his crisp, clean and perfectly cream carpet. All she thought before passing out was, I can smell Vodka and Redbull, I am never drinking those two things again!’

I hope you enjoyed my small, silly sex scene. If you didn’t I completely understand why as it was my first attempt., even I don’t really see it as sexy but more true to life as I’m sure hundreds, thousands and most probably millions of women have done it, thrown up before getting to the good stuff. Why not give it a go, you never know you might be a secret Romance writer.

Good Luck.x.


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